Baptists Suck. Jesus Freaks Rock.

Today I experienced the Rapture!

On the University of Mississippi campus was a family of young Jesus Freaks holding enormous signs and passing out tracts. What made them truly wonderful is that their signs included such slogans as, "Go to God, Not to Church."

Now, I am not religious, and for God's sake not Christian, though I could have a good conversation with you about the "Man," so try and imagine my joy at seeing these young, rich, spoiled, white SUV driv'n Baptist (shithead) kids red-in-the-face hollaring at these other kids, quite plainly dressed, who's mission was only to point out the obvious hypocrisies of modern Christianity.

A Holy War!

I wish I'd known. I'd have made a killing on Molotov Cocktails. $2.00 a piece.

It was strange, the anger from the Baptist side. They were seeing red and looking positively MURDEROUS. The screaming was delicious. Their puny world was being challenged and without any wisdom they attacked the invaders without asking, "Well, am I perfect in my beliefs? Could I find room to be better?" No. Tradition was at stake.

Days like this I wish there was a hell for these hypocrites to fall into, and of course, I'd have to be there too, just to see the look on their faces. But this is nothing original.

But seriously, Witch trials contained less wrath that today's Christian vs. Xmas rally. There is limitless joy in seeing a Christian face twisted with hate.

Unless of course there is rope at hand.

I'm thinking about joining this merry band of Christian busting Christians for two reasons. I will go to any length to piss off a Baptist and, the girls were HOT! I mean, H-O-T hot. Tall, svelt, blonde, eager. They could teach me to pray. I mean REALLY pray. Pray till it hurts.